Life is beautiful

you just need to be intentional

As I write this, I am lying in my grandma's bed under her covers, taking in the scent of the laundry detergent that reminds me of her. It's been over a month (what a wild thought…) since she has passed away. I've been sleeping here for the past few nights, comforted by the memories that linger in this room, and house. I will write about her, I promise I will, but that is for another time.

I've been thinking about this whole last year and what it brought, and what it took away. I think of the trip to the seaside, the times I felt so hopeless and devastated, the times when grief overwhelms me, the time I realized I was totally and completely in love, my studies and the friendships that have grown deeper and more lovely. The more I think about it all, the good and bad, I've come to this conclusion: life is beautiful.

It is so, so beautiful. Even though there are times you will feel hopeless and all seems lost, empty and you may feel numb, there will be moments that the sunshine breaks through. As someone who is living with depression, it is important to me that I identify those moments, and cherish them close to my heart.

I am reminded of a quote I heard once a while ago that goes something like this: “life is like the piano. you have the black keys which represent pain and suffering, and the white keys which represent hope, joy, and love…but you need both to create beautiful music.”

That is what makes life so beautiful. How can I explain all that I mean? Life is beautiful because of the pain, because of the suffering, and because of the love, joy and peace that exists.

Think of the feeling you get when you've just taken a shower and climbed into your newly washed sheets. That is a ray of sunshine breaking through. Or, maybe think of a song that calms your nerves and makes you smile. Again, that small glimmer. Feel the lukewarm breeze that combs through your hair on a spring day. All of these and more are notes of grace, you just have to look for them. And if you look, you will find.

I end this now, begging you to find that beauty in life, because the more you go through, the more you grow and mature, you'll begin to find beauty in the tiny things, and it is hard, I know. It's taken me so long, but you have to be intentional. It sounds cliche I suppose; finding beauty in the small things, but I cannot stress enough how true that is.

Life is beautiful, and just like the keys on the piano, you need both the bad and good in it.

love,

ophie